Sunday Sleep Dilemma

Q: Are bedtimes with my 9 year old still important? Don't they know when they are ready to go to sleep?

A: I taught fifth grade for many years. During my time teaching, numerous parents had decided that by fifth grade their child was ready to be responsible for himself. And time and time again they weren't. Our kids need us to guide them and make the decisions for them that they are not mature enough to make. This includes when to go to bed.

Please take the time to explain why they need 10-11 hours of sleep enough. Make it a math problem and have them figure out when there bedtime is, but enforce it. It is important.

Saturday Sleep Tip

Designate a homework time that is not right before bedtime- be consistent in this time. Leave kids with some wind down time before you tuck them in at an appropriate bedtime (so that they receive 10-11 hours of sleep).

Please feel free to share your ideal homework time.

Sleep Ponderings from Me

Stalling... does anyone else have a child working towards an Emmy in bedtime stalling? "I'm hungry." "I'm thirsty." "I need to go to the bathroom." Again? "Um, mom I need to tell you, um, something...{pause}...." "Oh, we forgot to..."

My kids are usually pretty good, but they do go through weeks where they work really hard at delaying bedtime, testing and retesting what they can get away with- does that battle ever end? Just when you think things are easy- they have to check again what rules apply. The need to be consistent is SO great.

I try to take care of any and all of the inevitable pleas before they become pleas. We brush teeth, go potty, have a drink before we do the final tuck in. And when all the kids are down- ahhhh, quiet, sweet freedom for a few short hours. And then, there are the nights where just when you are sighing one of the kids opens the door, "Mom...." Darn it! Back on duty... take care of the need, and hopefully you are off the clock. But, I love it. I love my babies and taking care of their needs.

Question for You

How do you balance school, extra activities, homework, and bedtimes?

Sunday Sleep Dilemma

Q: My child who still needs a nap and takes a long nap- usually until 4:30pm or so- has a very difficult time going to sleep at night so that he gets his RDA of sleep, what can I do about this?

A: You know best if your child is ready to give up the afternoon nap (usually happens between 3 and 5, maybe 6). So, if he is not I suggest moving his nap to an earlier time. My son had this same issue when he was 27 months. I moved his nap from 1:30 to 12:30 and he still took a 2- 3 hour nap, but he was able to go to bed easily at 7pm instead of talking and singing in there for hours. If you just set the new precedent that after lunch we read a book and go straight to naptime (or skip the book) it may make the timing more understandable to your child.

Saturday Sleep Tip

A house rule: NO Night Owls Allowed

Note: Kids age 5-12 need 10-11 hours of sleep a night.

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Sleep Ponderings from Me

My oldest child is only 4 1/2; she goes to school 2 days a week; goes to ballet once a week; some months has swimming lessons 2 days a week; I work out one day a week (where I bring them). We don't have that much going on, but as the three get older my days are going to be full of dropping off, picking up, dropping off, picking up, waiting- school, ballet, soccer. Then, coming home: homework, dinner, baths, reading, and who knows what else. And of course I will still have their goal of 10-11 hours of sleep a night... so an 8pm bedtime. Talk about need to be efficient. I can't even imagine taking care of all the things that would need to get taken care of if I was working full time. You can see how bedtimes easily creep to a later and later time for some families- they just do not have enough time to get everything done. So, I challenge myself and you to make your child's bedtime (amount of sleep) a #1 priority, and adjust the rest of your life accordingly. Maybe your child doesn't play every sport or isn't involved in every extracurricular activity. Maybe you pay the extra $10 to do vons.com (honestly not a plug for them), so that you can keep errands at bay. Choices will have to be made so that everyone can have the chance to give their best by being well-rested.

Question for You

What has been your biggest sleep challenge as your children have entered grade school?

Sleep "Product" Review

Check out Rockabye Baby! Lullaby Renditions by Coldplay. This is a lullaby CD you will enjoy... it takes Coldplay songs and makes them lullabyey (made-up word). There are other artists that have similar CDs: Bob Marley, Radiohead, The Cure, Pink Floyd...

When would you use a lullaby CD? Play some nice, calming music during bathtime, while you read stories, just in the room as you go through your bedtime routine. May also increase your child's music appreciation.

http://www.amazon.com/Rockabye-Baby-Lullaby-Renditions-Coldplay/dp/B000GY72J2/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=music&qid=1220742130&sr=8-1

Sunday Sleep Dilemma

Q: My kids need to go to bed earlier than they did during the summer? How do we adjust it?

A: First, know that your kids' bodies need the sleep and want the sleep. School is going to wear them out, and everything else that they have in their lives. At the end of the day you are going to have tired kids- even if their mouths protest the idea of bedtime. Second, you need to come up with a bedtime that considers the amount of sleep that they need. Children ages 5 to 12 need about 10 to 11 hours of sleep a night, so from the time they need to wake-up figure out what the appropriate bedtime needs to be. Third, consider explaining the change you are going to make if you think this is necessary. Fourth, make the change over a few days, focus on a consistent, short, and calming bedtime routine. You aren't going to rock your 10 year old, but you may want them to take a bath or shower, brush their teeth..., and then read a chapter in a book with them.

Their sleep is so important and often not given enough attention. Remember you are the parent, and it is your job to teach your child healthy sleep habits. Numerous sources link inadequate sleep to academic and behavioral problems. Our kids need their sleep.

For more sleep facts check out, http://www.sleepfoundation.org/site/c.huIXKjM0IxF/b.2419303/k.27B0/The_Sleep_Of_Americas_Children.htm

Saturday Sleep Tip

According to an article from BabyCenter, you may want to try a "sleep instigating snack an hour before bedtime. Some foods naturally spark a release of serotonin, the body's built-in sleep inducer. Try a glass of milk, a piece of whole-wheat toast with a slice of cheese, half a peanut butter sandwich, or oatmeal with bananas."

This tip of course would have to fit with your schedule, and skip if your kids have no problems falling asleep.

In contrast, you want to avoid sugary and caffeine filled foods before bed.

Even the food they do or do not eat can and should be part of the right bedtime routine.

Sleep Ponderings from Me

I just returned home from a 12 day vacation with the family. Husband, wife, three kids drive 2000 miles in 12 days touching five states. It was quite the trip. And I would have to say that my kids (ages 4 1/2, 2 1/2, and 5 months) were absolutely amazing!

So, how did they sleep you wonder? They missed a couple naps when we were driving- just depended on what we did that day and where we had to stop, but overall their sleep stayed on schedule. My 5 month old took great naps on the road, and she would take 3 hour naps on the beach (in her pack'n'play, covered with a blanket, with her noise maker). She woke up at night some of the nights- but 4 of us were staying in the same room. It is vacation; you can't expect perfection.

My other two kids went to bed a bit later a couple of the nights- had to be flexible for the extra fun things you do on vacation, but they went to bed easily, took good naps and were amazing.
Thanks to them getting to sleep well on the trip they were able to keep great attitudes.

Question for You

What is your child's age and bedtime? Is this consistent?

Sleep "Product" Review

Let's note that my sleep "product's" are not necessarily something that you can buy at the store to make sleep occur. They are either some sort of contraption, sleep aid, or something loosely related to sleep.

My kids enjoy the book Owen by Kevin Henkes. It is a cute story about a mouse who is attached to his fuzzy yellow blanket, Fuzzy. This blanket goes with him everywhere. The goal of the parents in the story is to get Owen to not bring his blanket to school. It is a nice story about a blanket, parents, and transitioning to school.

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Sunday Sleep Dilemma

Q: How can my youngest get their full nap when I have a 2:30 pm pick-up for my oldest?

A: Well, in the ideal world we would all have a babysitter or a nanny that could stay with the youngest, or maybe a chauffeur to pick up the oldest... but most of us are lacking those resources. I would suggest moving their nap up so that they can get a "full" nap in time for you to pick up your oldest. Then, you may need to move their bedtime a slight bit earlier depending on their melt-down factor. You probably want to take a few days to gradually make this transition if possible. If you don't have a few days, work to really wear them out before the new naptime and go through a nice calming routine before putting them down. This "new" plan will also continue to allow for you to have some "quieter" time during the day.

Saturday Sleep Tip

Gradeschoolers can be reasoned with (to some degree), use this when dealing with sleep issues. Explain to them there body needs sleep to be the best.... to be the best at school, sports, whatever else they use their energy for.